The Neuroscientist Who Lost Her Mind by Barbara K. Lipska

Author:Barbara K. Lipska
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

One hot and humid day in mid-June, I head to work in the early morning to avoid driving in heavy traffic because driving has become increasingly confusing. By late afternoon, I’m exhausted. I’ve worked all day without a break, trying to make up for lost hours spent at doctors’ appointments and hooked up to the IV to receive my immunotherapy drugs.

I look outside and see heavy, dark clouds gathering over the high-rises of the NIMH campus. It’s going to pour soon. I’m irritated by the weather and so, so tired.

I have to leave. I have to leave right now.

I bolt from my office to the multilevel garage where I always park and head to the same spot I always use. “My” space is usually open when I get to work because I always arrive early, often before the garage has any cars at all. The garage I use is not the one closest to the building where I work, but I like to take a little walk at the start and then again at the end of my day.

For many years, I had limited need for these ugly, concrete constructions to park my car. Whenever the weather allowed, I biked to work, about twenty miles each way on a peaceful, tree-lined trail along the Potomac River. But no more. Since my brain surgery and the immunotherapy, I don’t have the same energy and stamina, so I drive to work, although I hate it. I feel reduced to a lesser version of myself. But at least I have a lovely walk to relax and unwind after a day in the office.

After ten minutes, I reach the garage. But I don’t see my silver Toyota RAV4 in my regular spot.

That’s weird. I don’t remember having to park somewhere new today. I was in early, like I always am—wasn’t I?

I walk up one aisle and down another. The garage is full, but my Toyota is nowhere to be found. I search each floor, trudging back and forth, scanning the rows of cars. I’m concerned, then very worried.

Someone stole my car!

Or maybe I just—I don’t know. Maybe I parked somewhere new and don’t recall it?

I reach into my purse and pull out the car key. I press the alarm button and hear a beep. It’s coming from far off. I walk toward the sound, pressing the button from time to time to make another beep, then another.

What is happening? It makes no sense at all.

I retrace my steps, go back to where I started, and press the button on my key again. I hear the beep once more. But when I walk toward the sound, I can’t hear it anymore. I try the same thing over and over: press, beep, nothing. I can’t locate my car.

I’m confused and lost. I don’t understand what is going on. I don’t understand the world. It’s playing tricks on me, strange and cruel tricks.

I see a woman walking in my direction. I hesitate for a moment before approaching her.

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